The Schoolโs Top Idol Is Acting Like Sheโs My Childhood Friend for Some Reason and Just Keeps Closing the Distance on Her Ownโฆ?! ~Stop Getting All Gloomy on Me Just Because I Turned You Down!~
After finishing our conversation with Kyosuke, the three of us headed toward the mallโs exit.
The crowd was gradually changing as evening approached. Mixed in with the families from earlier in the day were more students returning from shopping and adults who looked like they were finishing up work. The bright lighting inside the stores made the dimness outside feel even more pronounced.
Kyosuke occasionally glanced at me with a look of concern.
I returned his gaze with a neutral expression.
The old me would probably have forced a smile. I might have said, โIโm fine, donโt worry about it,โ in a lighthearted tone. But this time, I didnโt do that. I just nodded slightly.
Kyosuke didnโt press the matter any further.
I was grateful for that silence.
โWell then, Iโm heading this way.โ
As we reached the exit, Kyosuke pointed in a different direction from us.
โThanks for today.โ
โSame to you. Iโm glad you talked to me.โ
Kyosuke said that and smiled slightly.
Then he looked over at Hoshimiya.
โHoshimiya, umโฆ please look out for Seita too.โ
โSure. Leave it to me.โ
Hoshimiya nodded with a perfect smile.
At that smile, Kyosuke looked a little embarrassed again. No wonder. There arenโt many high school boys who can stay calm when a famous idol smiles right at them.
I let out a small sigh beside him.
Itโs not โLeave it to me.โ
If anything, she seems like the last person you should leave it to.
But Kyosuke turned his gaze back to me with a serious expression.
โSeita. Iโll be in touch.โ
โYeah.โ
โDonโt push yourself too hard.โ
โโฆYeah.โ
Kyosuke gave a quick wave as he walked away.
I stood there for a while until his back disappeared into the crowd. It should have been a back Iโd known for years, but it looked slightly different. Had I changed, or had Kyosuke changed? Or had we simply spent more time apart?
Once he was completely out of sight, Hoshimiya and I started walking.
We were heading in the same direction for a while.
โThatโs good, Seita,โ
Hoshimiya said beside me.
โThat you were able to put the past behind you, even just a little.โ
โThough we did end up with a huge misunderstanding at the very end.โ
โWas it a misunderstanding?โ
โIt was a misunderstanding.โ
I answered immediately.
Hoshimiya pouted her lips slightly, looking a bit dissatisfied.
It was trueโtalking to Kyosuke had made the presence of the past feel just a little lighter.
It hadnโt completely vanished, though.
To begin with, the past doesnโt just disappear. You canโt pretend something that happened never did. The words spoken to me, the stares directed at me, the suffocating atmosphere of that dayโnone of it will ever fade from my mind.
But the feeling that I had no choice but to carry all of that alone had shifted just a little.
Kyosuke listened to me.
He didnโt blame me or brush it off; he just listened.
Just that alone made me feel like the knot deep in my heart had loosened just a little.
However, the โchildhood friendโ bomb that Hoshimiya dropped at the very end seemed unlikely to fade away, for a different reason.
Kyosuke seemed to have believed it completely.
That misunderstanding will probably continue for a while. If things go badly, it might even spread within our group of friends. The next time we meet, Iโll definitely be bombarded with questions.
But strangely, it didnโt feel unpleasant.
It is a hassle.
Itโs quite a hassle.
Still, compared to the suffocating feeling Iโd had just a moment ago, this was the kind of hassle I could laugh about.
As I was thinking about that, Hoshimiya, who had been walking beside me, gently leaned her body against my shoulder.
The moment that soft sensation touched me, my body jerked.
โHey, Hoshimiya-san.โ
โSeita.โ
โWhat is it? Iโd really appreciate it if you could move away.โ
โIโm not moving.โ
Her answer was immediate.
Hoshimiya kept leaning lightly against my shoulder as she stared straight ahead. Her eyes, hidden behind her fashion glasses, seemed to be looking off into the distance.
โYou know, when you were talking to Kyosuke, I felt a little uneasy.โ
โA little uneasy?โ
โYeah. Seeing Seita share parts of his pastโparts that only I donโt knowโwith Kyosukeโฆ it made me feel a littleโฆโ
Hoshimiya trailed off there.
Then she corrected herself softly.
โNo. I felt really, really uneasy.โ
I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye.
Hoshimiya wasnโt smiling.
That said, she wasnโt angry either. It was just that there was little light in the depths of her eyes. A loneliness as if she alone had been left behind, and jealousy toward Kyosuke, who already knew my past. Both of those emotions were faintly lingering there.
Itโs heavy.
It really is heavy.
But Hoshimiya didnโt hide it.
โWhen the time comes, Iโll tell you everything, Hoshimiya-san.โ
โReally?โ
She looked at me immediately.
โWill you tell me everything?โ
โI will. Iโll tell you everything, butโฆโ
Thatโs when I stopped speaking.
To my own surprise, the back of my throat felt heavy.
โWill you be able to handle it?โ
I regretted it a little after I said it.
Itโs heavy.
This is heavier for me.
But it was the truth.
My past isnโt something that can be easily digested as a mere anecdote. Itโs not as simple as โI told you, so itโs overโ or โYou heard it, so itโs resolved.โ It passes that weight on to the listener as well.
Could Hoshimiya really bear the full weight of it?
I was worried.
I was scared.
Hoshimiya stopped walking.
I stopped too.
It was an evening street. There werenโt that many people around. A little ways off, a mother and child walked past.
Hoshimiya stood in front of me.
โOf course.โ
Her voice was unwavering.
โIโm Seitaโs childhood friend.โ
โThatโs not quite right.โ
โBut Iโll listen. Even if I werenโt your childhood friend, Iโd still listen.โ
Hoshimiya looked up at me.
Deep in her eyes, the dark jealousy from earlier still lingered. But that wasnโt all. There was desperation, obsession, and a heavy desire to know meโall of it was there.
โIf Seita ever wants to talk, let him tell me. Itโs okay if he stops mid-sentence. Itโs okay if he cries, gets angry, or wants to run away. Iโll remember it all.โ
โRemember it?โ
โYeah. Iโll carry what youโve been carrying all by yourself.โ
Hearing her say that put me in a bind.
Even though it put me in a bind, the depths of my chest grew just a little warmer.
โโฆAlright.โ
When I answered that, Hoshimiya smiled as if relieved.
Then she stood beside me again.
Only, she was standing a little closer than before.
Probably because weโd made one more promise.
ใโปใโปใโป
The next day.
I was heading to school as usual.
About a week after the entrance ceremony, I was gradually getting used to the layout of the school. The location of the faculty room. Where the school store was. The hallways with few people. Places to escape to during lunch break. All of that was forming a mental map in my head.
Of course, whether Iโd gotten used to the social dynamics was a different matter entirely.
I changed my shoes at the entrance and was about to head to my classroom.
Thatโs when the far end of my field of vision suddenly looked unusually bright.
It wasnโt physically glowing.
It just felt that way.
Hoshimiya Rino was there.
She was near the entrance, surrounded by a group of students. There were both girls and boys. It seemed to include not only my classmates but students from other classes as well.
It was a sight I was starting to get used to.
Hoshimiya draws a crowd wherever she goes. People call out to her, smile at her, and look at her with envy and curiosity. She handled it all gracefully. She was gentle with everyone, maintaining her distance without being rude.
The schoolโs top idol.
That phrase was starting to feel more and more real.
I glanced at the scene out of the corner of my eye and tried to walk past.
As long as she doesnโt spot me.
Even if she does, sheโs surrounded by people. Thereโs no reason for her to go out of her way to call out to me.
Thinking that was naive.
โGood morning, Seita!โ
Hoshimiyaโs voice echoed through the entrance hall.
All eyes in the vicinity turned toward us at once.
I froze.
โG-good morning, Hoshimiya-san.โ
A murmur spread through the crowd.
A famous idol who was starting to become the talk of the school had called out to an unremarkable, plain-looking boy who didnโt even stand out in classโusing his first name.
That alone was enough to make it a major event.
Hoshimiya slipped through the crowd and stood in front of me.
Her smile was perfect.
But I was the only one who knew.
That behind this smile lie the same heavy jealousy as last night, and the fear of being left behind.
โHey, Seita.โ
โWhat is it?โ
โTomorrow. After school, do you want to go on a date?โ
โHuh?โ
My true voice slipped out before I could stop it.
The buzz around us grew even louder.
โA date?โ
โDid you just say โdateโ?โ
โHoshimiya-san?โ
โAnd the other person is Takahara-kun?โ
I felt like clutching my head.
Hoshimiya was smiling brightly.
Her expression made it clear she knew exactly what she was doing.
โHoshimiya-san, watch your language.โ
โThen, letโs just say weโre taking a detour after school as childhood friends.โ
โThatโs making it worse.โ
โWhich one do you prefer, Seita?โ
โNeither.โ
Hoshimiya tilted her head just a little.
That gesture alone made a few people around us gasp. She really is a famous idol. She completely understands the angles that make her look cute in public.
And sheโs using that cuteness to cut off my escape route.
โBut we made a promise yesterday, didnโt we? That youโd tell me someday.โ
โThat has nothing to do with our after-school date, does it?โ
โIt does. Itโs an important time for me to get to know Seita.โ
Hoshimiyaโs voice was soft.
But the weight of her words was heavy.
โBesides, it still stings a little that youโre the only one who knows a bit about Seitaโs past.โ
โThis isnโt the place to talk about it.โ
โThen Iโll ask you after school tomorrow.โ
โAre you assuming Iโll tell you?โ
โJust tell me as much as you feel like sharing.โ
Hoshimiya said that and gently tugged at my sleeve.
It was such a small movement that no one around us could see it.
But I knew.
Right now, behind her smile, she was feeling anxious.
She might get rejected.
I might put some distance between us gain.
Even though I talked to Kyosuke, I might not be willing to talk to her.
That feeling was seeping into the pressure of her fingertips.
It seems the romantic comedy playing out inside my head keeps heading in a weird direction.
Itโs not the standard bittersweet storyline.
A famous idol claims to be my childhood friend, wants to know my past, gets jealous, and declares an after-school date at the school entrance.
Itโs way too intense for reality.
Even as a story, itโs pretty complicated.
โโฆTomorrow after school, just for a little while.โ
When I said that, Hoshimiyaโs eyes lit up.
โReally?โ
โBut itโs not a date.โ
โYeah. Thatโs fine for now.โ
โPlease stop saying โfor nowโ.โ
Hoshimiya smiled happily.
Seeing that smile, the crowd around us stirred once more.
I let out a deep sigh inside.
And just like that, my peaceful day had already fallen apart right there at the entrance this morning.
And after school tomorrow, things are going to get complicated again.
I had a feeling that premonition, more than anything else, was going to come true.
Maigetsu