The Schoolโs Top Idol Is Acting Like Sheโs My Childhood Friend for Some Reason and Just Keeps Closing the Distance on Her Ownโฆ?! ~Stop Getting All Gloomy on Me Just Because I Turned You Down!~
The night of the day I made plans to go out with Hoshimiya after school.
I was watching something I shouldnโt have been watching.
โI like you, Kahiko kun. So I want you to struggle with this for the rest of your lifeโand stay by my side forever.โ
On my smartphone screen, the heroine of this seasonโs hottest romantic comedy anime was making such a heavy confession.
The title of the show is Why Is My Teenage Romance Suddenly Overwhelming Me, Even Though My Love IQ Is Zero?.
Itโs a new romantic comedy thatโs been all the rage in anime circles lately. The protagonist is Kahiko Wataruโa guy whose character sheet seems like God went a little overboard: heโs clueless, handsome, an all-around athlete, and secretly a top student.
For some reason, heโs adored by countless heroines.
His childhood friend.
The cool classmate.
The underclassman manager.
The student council president.
The girl next door.
In short, beautiful girls of every type gather around this guy, Kahiko Wataru, reveling in their youth and navigating their respective romances.
For anyone who likes standard rom-coms, this is surely a show to enjoy with a pounding heart.
But for me, with my own hang-ups about youth, itโs different.
Every time a heart-fluttering scene comes up, it feels like a rusty knife is being pressed against the softest part of my heart. Every time a sweet line is spoken, my miserable middle school romance is replayed in my mind. Every time a heroine blushes, the cold words spoken to me that day echo in my ears.
โCould you please stop coming near me?โ
Stop it.
Iโm just watching an anime right now.
This isnโt real.
The Kahiko Wataru on the screen is a guy living in a different world from me.
And yet.
Before I knew it, I was clenching my phone tightly in my hand.
Kahiko Wataru.
Who the hell are you?
Why are you so popular?
Why does everyone fall for you?
Why can you just bathe in it all while remaining so calm and oblivious?
Inside me, my rationality crumbled with a loud crash.
โGugagagagagaโฆ! Iโll cut you downโฆ Iโll cut you downโฆ! Kahiko Wataru, Iโll cut down your youth right now, and then Iโll die tooโฆ!โ
In the dark room, I writhed around on the bed.
I pressed my face into the pillow, letting out a scream that wouldnโt come out as a sound. The manga at my feet crumbled. The card sleeves on the desk shifted. On my phone, Kahiko Wataru was once again showering the heroine with his oblivious kindness.
Stop it.
Please stop.
Donโt provoke my youth complex any further.
This pain isnโt just jealousy born from a lack of romantic experience. It runs much deeper. Precisely because I love the dazzling world of romantic comedies, the gap between them and reality hurts so much. Iโve been saved by these fairy tales, yet sometimes those very fairy tales dig right into the raw wounds of reality.
But I couldnโt stop.
It hurts.
Itโs agonizing.
But itโs entertaining.
In the end, I hit play on the next episode.
And once again, Kahiko Wataru finds himself being pursued by another heroine.
โKill meeeeeโฆ! Burn the very concept of youth to the groundโฆ!โ
I screamed into my pillow.
Of course, I wouldnโt do anything stupid like banging my head against the wall.
I havenโt lost my mind that much.
But in my heart, I was banging my head against the wall over and over.
Before I knew it, it was late at night.
After finishing the anime itself, Iโd even started watching commentary videos.
Story analysis.
Explanations of foreshadowing.
Predictions for each heroineโs route.
Is Kahiko Wataru really that oblivious, or is he just pretending not to notice?
The comment section was ablaze with excitement.
Swept up in that fervor, I shuffled my card game deck in my hands. The only sound in the night-time room was the rhythmic rustling of the card sleeves.
โKahikoโฆ youโve got it good, donโt youโฆ? If you agonize over it, you just get more heroinesโฆ As for me, all my agonizing did was make me unable to go to schoolโฆโ
Saying that myself made me feel a little sad.
I drew a card from the top of the deck.
It wasnโt the card I needed.
Just like my life, the things I want never come when I want them.
Still, I kept shuffling the deck.
Before I knew it, it had grown slightly lighter outside the window.
ใโปใโปใโป
Monday.
I was completely sleep-deprived.
My eyes felt heavy.
A dull drowsiness lingered deep in my head. Even though my body was dressed in my uniform and heading to school, it felt like only my brain had been left behind in my room at 3 a.m.
That romance comedy anime from yesterday was pure poison.
I watched too much.
I definitely watched way too much.
And it wasnโt just the show itselfโI watched analysis videos, explanations of foreshadowing, heroine rankings, and even predictions of future developments from fans of the original manga. At that point, it wasnโt so much enjoying the show as it was willingly drinking poison.
By the time I entered the classroom, my eyes were probably dead.
โHey, Seita. Staying up late?โ
The moment I stepped into the classroom, Hoshimiya noticed me.
She was surrounded by people again today. Sheโd been chatting with a few girls, but the moment she saw me, she naturally stepped out of the circle and walked over.
Sheโs dazzling.
Hoshimiya in the morning is truly dazzling.
Itโs too much stimulation for my sleep-deprived eyes.
Plus, thanks to yesterdayโs anime, my brain is currently in an insanely romance-comedy-hypersensitive state. School. Morning. A beautiful girl. Being called by my first name. The buzz of people around us.
No matter how I look at it, this is the setup for a romance comedy.
But in the romance comedy anime Iโve watched, thereโs never been a heroine whoโs an active idol claiming to be my childhood friend and closing the distance between us.
Reality sometimes has a sloppier setup than fiction.
โUm, wellโฆ Iโve been watching anime since yesterday, so I stayed up all nightโฆโ
โDoes that mean you donโt need โyouthโ?โ
Hoshimiya asked, peering right into my face.
Sheโs close.
Sheโs close, and I canโt escape her gaze.
The stares from the guys around us hurt. They hurt like hell. Jealousy, confusion, curiosity, something just short of murderous intent. Stares mixed with all sorts of emotions pierced my back.
โNo, itโs a different romance comedy.โ
โA different one?โ
Hoshimiyaโs expression froze for just a split second.
Her smile remained.
But her eyes didnโt move.
โSeita, the day after we talked about I Donโt Need Youth, you stayed up all night watching a different romantic comedy.โ
โThe way you put it makes it sound like I was cheating.โ
โIsnโt that cheating?โ
โPlease donโt bring concepts of fidelity into watching shows.โ
Hoshimiya puffed out her cheeks just a little.
Cute.
Cute, but a bit much.
โWhat kind of show?โ
โItโs the one thatโs popular this season. The protagonist is the clueless type, but for some reason, heโs incredibly popular with the ladies.โ
โOh, the one with Kahiko-kun?โ
โYou know it?โ
โOf course I do. I watched a little of it myself.โ
Hoshimiya narrowed her eyes slightly at that.
โBut that heroineโs line is heavy, isnโt it? โI want to worry about you for the rest of my life, and I want you to stay by my side forever.โโ
โYou get that?โ
โI do.โ
Hoshimiya nodded without hesitation.
โI want the person I like to worry about me.โ
โYou relate to that part?โ
โWell, worrying means Iโm on their mind, right?โ
Her thoughts were heavy even this early in the morning.
I instinctively took a step back.
But Hoshimiya took a step forward to match it. The buzz around us grew a little louder.
โDid you struggle too, Seita, while watching that anime yesterday?โ
โIt wasnโt so much struggling as my โyouth complexโ exploding.โ
โSo, was I in there too?โ
โWhy would you say that?โ
โBecause, Seita, youโve been thinking of me lately whenever you watch romantic comedies, havenโt you?โ
Sheโd hit the nail on the head.
Sheโd hit the nail right on the head.
Lately, whenever I watch a romantic comedy, Hoshimiyaโs face flashes before my eyes. When a childhood friend heroine appears, I remember Hoshimiyaโs fake โchildhood friendโ act. When a clingy heroine appears, I remember Hoshimiyaโs eyes. When I see a scene where the protagonist saves the heroine with his kindness, the memory of helping her at the shopping mall a few days ago crosses my mind.
I donโt want to admit it.
But I canโt deny it either.
โโฆIโm sleep-deprived, so could you please stop this mind game?โ
โHehe. Seita, youโre so easy to read.โ
Hoshimiya laughed cheerfully.
The people around us stirred again at the sight of that smile.
I felt a knot form in my stomach from the tension in the classroom. Just by Hoshimiya Rino approaching me, everyone around us starts making up their own stories. I have to endure it.
โSeita.โ
Hoshimiya lowered her voice slightly.
โSee you after school today.โ
As she said that and smiled, she looked incredibly beautiful in the morning light.
But at the same time, she also looked a little heavy.
The expectation deep within her eyes.
Her desire to know my past.
The jealousy she felt because only Kyosuke knew a little more than she did.
I could sense, somehow, just how much meaning she was packing into that time after school.
โโฆJust a little bit, okay?โ
โYeah. Just a little bit.โ
Hoshimiya replied.
But there was a tone to her voice that suggested she might have added, โFor now.โ
I decided not to think too deeply about it.
I wonder what kind of day today will be.
As I was thinking about that, Hoshimiya suddenly peered at my face.
โSo, Seita.โ
โIs there something else?โ
โYou look sleepy, so Iโll wake you up today. If you look like youโre about to fall asleep during class.โ
โNo, itโs fine.โ
โBecause weโre childhood friends.โ
โThatโs irrelevant.โ
โBecause we sit next to each other.โ
โThatโs true, butโโ
โThen itโs settled.โ
Hoshimiya nodded with satisfaction.
Then, in a voice loud enough for everyone around us to hear, she casually said,
โIf Seita falls asleep, Iโll wake him up gently, so donโt worry.โ
The classroom buzzed with murmurs.
The boysโ stares felt even more piercing.
I felt like burying my face in my hands.
It seemed like the romantic comedy playing out in my life was continuing to take a weird turn today, too.
And the screenwriter for it was probably Hoshimiya Rino herself.
Maigetsu