Episode 51 – What exactly is that relationship?

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The School’s Top Idol Is Acting Like She’s My Childhood Friend for Some Reason and Just Keeps Closing the Distance on Her Own…?! ~Stop Getting All Gloomy on Me Just Because I Turned You Down!~

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On our way to Rino’s house, we never let go of each other’s hands.

For a while after leaving school, we kept a distance where our uniform sleeves would just brush against each other, since there were people around. But the moment we left the station and turned onto a quiet street, Rino’s fingers brushed against mine as if searching for my hand.

When I squeezed her hand back, Rino smiled slightly without saying a word.

It’s been like that ever since.

A boy and a girl, having finished preparing for the cultural festival, are walking home hand in hand along the night street.

And on top of that, we’re headed to the girl’s house.

The moment I calmly assessed the situation, my “teenage insecurity” alarm started blaring.

Danger.

The romance comedy level has significantly exceeded the safe limit.

Please let go of her hand immediately and maintain a healthy distance.

But Rino’s hand was warm.

The hand that waited for me today when I was too scared to be in the group photo.

The hand that held mine in the empty hallway when I didn’t run away.

I couldn’t bring myself to let go of it.

“Seita.”

“What?”

“We’ve been holding hands the whole time today, haven’t we?”

“Don’t make me think about that right now.”

“I’ve been thinking about it the whole time.”

“You don’t have to say that.”

“I like your hand, Seita.”

“It’s kind of awkward to be praised just for my hand.”

“I like everything about you—your hand, your voice, your face, your personality, even your annoying habits.”

“That last part isn’t a compliment, is it?”

“I’m saying I like you, so it is a compliment.”

Rino is walking along, looking genuinely happy as she gently shakes my hand.

I looked straight ahead so she wouldn’t see my face.

“What about you, Seita?”

“What do you mean?”

“What do you like about me?”

My heart skipped a beat.

I still haven’t explicitly told Rino that I like her.

She’s someone important to me.

She’s the closest to me.

Right now, Rino is the one in my heart.

The place I want to go back to is with Rino.

Even though I’ve said all that, I keep avoiding those two crucial words.

Even I have to admit I’m being stubborn.

“The premise of your question is wrong, isn’t it?”

“Do you hate me?”

“I don’t hate you.”

“Do I matter to you?”

“You matter to me.”

“Am I the one closest?”

“……Close.”

“So, do you like me?”

“Don’t corner me like this, step by step.”

Rino smiled contentedly.

“It’s okay to run away.”

“Is that really okay?”

“Yeah. Just for today.”

Those words struck me as odd, so I glanced over at her.

Rino was smiling.

But she was gripping my hand just a little tighter.

“I’ll wait until Seita says it to me someday.”

“……I see.”

“But until then, I’ll stay by your side. I’ll be right near your escape route, too.”

“You can’t call that an escape route.”

“I’ll just block the path that leads to Seita being alone.”

It was heavy, as expected.

Yet, part of me no longer feared that weight as much as I used to.

What lies behind Rino’s words isn’t just a desire to control me.

It’s her fear that I’ll suffer alone again and disappear without saying a word to anyone.

“There are times when I want to be alone, you know.”

“When that happens, I’ll wait a little ways off.”

“You won’t come back?”

“Because I want to be the first to see Seita when he comes back.”

Instead of answering, I squeezed our joined hands just a little tighter.

Rino didn’t say anything.

She just nuzzled her shoulder against mine.

　※　※　※

We passed through the entrance of the luxury high-rise apartment building and got into the elevator.

As the doors closed, the surroundings suddenly grew quiet.

A confined space.

Just the two of us.

On the mirrored wall, Rino and I, both in our school uniforms, were reflected side by side.

Our intertwined hands remained just as they were.

Rino was looking at me through the mirror.

“What?”

“It looks like we came home together.”

“Well, we actually did come home together, didn’t we?”

“That’s not what I mean.”

Rino rested her head slightly on my shoulder.

“It looks like we’re going back to the same house.”

Stop it.

Don’t make me imagine that in an elevator—a space with no escape.

A future scenario I never asked for unfolds in my mind.

Meeting up with Rino after work and going back to the same house.

Eating dinner.

Playing card games.

We’d exchange silly comments while watching the latest episode of I Don’t Need Youth!!.

That kind of life.

Impossible.

I’m still a freshman in high school.

We don’t even have a name for our relationship yet.

And yet, strangely enough, I found myself imagining it.

“Seita, your face is red.”

“It’s just hot in here.”

“It’s cool in here.”

“It’s hot to me.”

“So, if we get even closer, will you pass out?”

“Don’t test me.”

The moment I said that, Rino wrapped both her arms around my arm.

She wasn’t just leaning on my shoulder—she was pressing her whole body against me.

The soft touch and sweet scent came rushing toward me all at once, and my heart declared a state of emergency.

“Rino.”

“What?”

“You’re too close.”

“If you fall over, I’ll catch you.”

“You’re the one causing this.”

“If you don’t like it, I’ll move away.”

Even as she said that, Rino didn’t pull away.

I didn’t tell her to move away either.

We arrived at our floor, and the door opened.

Rino reluctantly unwrapped her arms from mine, but this time she immediately took my hand.

“Welcome, Seita.”

“Thanks for having me.”

“You can say ‘I’m home’ if you want.”

“This isn’t my house, is it?”

“It might become the same someday.”

“How many years into the future are you thinking?”

“Way into the future.”

Rino answered as if it were the most natural thing in the world and unlocked the front door.

The interior of the room was just as tidy as when I’d been there before.

The living room was so pristine it lacked any sense of daily life.

Hanging on the wall was a tapestry that read, “I Don’t Need Youth!!”

On the shelf were manga and card game supplies.

That corner alone looked like a place where “just Rino”—not Hoshimiya Rino—lived.

“Seita, have a seat. I’ll go change.”

“Got it.”

Rino disappeared into the back of the room.

Left alone, I sat down on the sofa.

When I opened my phone, today’s group photo had been posted in our class group chat.

My classmates were gathered around a sign.

Rino and I were in the center.

Rino wasn’t looking at the camera; she was glancing slightly in my direction.

I was standing next to her, smiling awkwardly.

But it wasn’t an unhappy expression.

It’s different from our middle school group photos.

Back then, I hated photos that seemed to prove I was alone.

In today’s photo, Rino is there.

She’s intertwined her little finger with mine.

It doesn’t show up on the screen.

But only the two of us know.

I had saved the photo without even realizing it.

“Seita saved it too.”

A voice sounded right by my ear.

“Whoa!”

Startled, I turned around to find Rino peering at the screen from behind the sofa—I hadn’t even noticed she was there.

She’d changed out of her school uniform into light-colored loungewear, and her long hair was down.

She looked much more vulnerable than she did at school.

“Don’t sneak up behind me like that.”

“It’s because Seita was so absorbed in the photos.”

“I was just checking them.”

“You saved them.”

“There’s no need to delete them, right?”

“I’m happy.”

Rino walked around the back of the sofa and sat down next to me.

Even though she was sitting next to me, there was plenty of room on the seat.

Yet she deliberately chose a spot where our shoulders would touch.

“Let me see.”

“You have the same photo, don’t you?”

“I want to see the one on Seita’s phone.”

“Is there a difference?”

“The difference is that Seita saved it himself.”

Rino pulled the phone toward her, along with my hand.

Her face came closer as she peered at the screen.

Close enough that our cheeks might touch.

I tried to pull back just a little.

But Rino’s hand grabbed my arm.

“Trying to get away?”

“You’re just too close.”

“You hate it?”

“…It’s not that I don’t like it, but—”

The moment I said it, Rino’s eyes flickered.

“Then, let’s just stay like this.”

“We’re just looking at the photos, okay?”

“Yeah.”

As she replied, Rino leaned even closer into me.

Her head rested on my shoulder.

Her hair brushed against my neck.

It felt like Rino could hear my heartbeat.

“Seita.”

“What?”

“Can I crop today’s photo so it’s just the two of us?”

“You already did that, didn’t you?”

“On your phone, too.”

“Why do you need mine as well?”

“I want to have the same one.”

Reluctantly, I opened the photo editing screen.

I adjusted the selection with two fingers, cropping the photo so that Rino and I remained in the center.

The cultural festival sign.

The same aprons.

Our shoulders pressed close together.

Depending on who was looking at it, it was a photo that could easily be misinterpreted.

“Is this okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Where are you going to save it?”

“As my wallpaper.”

“This is my phone, you know.”

“I could just use it as my contact picture.”

“I don’t want either of those.”

“Then, as the background for our chat screen.”

“All of those options are scary.”

“I’m most afraid of it getting deleted.”

Only that last line was spoken in a quiet voice.

I looked at Rino.

She kept her gaze fixed on the photo, her lips pressed together ever so slightly.

“I won’t delete it.”

“Really?”

“Because today, I’m glad I joined you, too.”

Rino looked up.

She was close.

So close that the tips of our noses almost touched.

Our breaths mingled.

It felt as if time had stopped.

“Seita.”

Rino’s voice was much softer than usual.

“If we were really that kind of relationship…”

“……What do you mean, ‘that kind’?”

“Are you going to make me say it?”

Rino’s eyes reflected only me.

I could run away if I wanted to.

She wasn’t holding me down.

Her hand was on my arm, but she wasn’t using any force.

Even so, I couldn’t move.

Rino’s face drew closer, little by little.

I could see every single one of her eyelashes.

My heart was pounding so hard it felt like it might burst.

“Seita, do you mind?”

Rino stopped just before our lips touched.

She was waiting for my answer.

The Rino of the past might have closed the distance on impulse.

But now, she was waiting.

For me to choose.

“……I don’t mind.”

A hoarse voice escaped my throat.

Rino’s eyes widened in uncertainty.

I didn’t even know what I’d just allowed myself to do.

I just didn’t want to stop her from getting closer.

“Then—”

Rino leaned in just a little closer.

At that moment.

Rino’s phone, sitting on the table, vibrated loudly.

We pulled away from each other at the same time.

Rino looked at her phone, her face flushed bright red.

The screen showed an incoming call from her manager.

“…Maybe you should answer it.”

“I don’t want to.”

“It might be work.”

“This moment is more important.”

“Rino.”

“If only it had been ten seconds later.”

Rino pouted, looking genuinely frustrated.

I covered my face with one hand.

That was close.

What was so close?

No, I didn’t even have to think about it.

If the call had come just a few seconds later…

I would have been with Rino—

“Seita.”

“Answer the phone.”

“Can we continue?”

“Don’t ask me that now!”

“Later?”

“I said don’t ask!”

Rino answered the call with a look of dissatisfaction.

Her voice shifted to her calm, professional tone.

Standing beside her, I desperately tried to calm my heart, which was still racing.

As I tried to look away, my eyes fell on the smartphone screen.

A cropped photo of Rino and me.

We were standing shoulder to shoulder, wearing matching aprons, smiling gently.

The meaning of that photo seemed different now than it had just a moment ago.

I hadn’t said I didn’t like it.

The idea of almost touching Rino.

Far from refusing, I hadn’t looked away even for a second.

I was reaching my limit—I could no longer pretend not to realize what that meant.

“Seita.”

Rino, having ended her call, grabbed my sleeve.

“A photo shoot came up suddenly for tomorrow.”

“I see.”

“I can’t go home with you.”

“If it’s work, there’s nothing we can do about it.”

“That’s why I want to stay a little closer to you right now.”

Rino leaned her shoulder against mine again.

This time, she didn’t get quite as close as before.

She just rested her head on my shoulder.

After a moment’s hesitation, I placed my hand on Rino’s hair.

I stroked it gently.

Rino’s body trembled slightly.

“Seita?”

“You’re tired, aren’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“Get some rest. I’ll stay here until you wake up.”

“Don’t use formal language.”

“Is that what you’re worried about?”

“You’re stroking my head.”

“I’ll stop if you don’t like it.”

“Don’t stop.”

Rino gripped the hem of my uniform and closed her eyes.

“We don’t have to continue what we were doing earlier—this is enough for now.”

“……I see.”

“But please do it sometime.”

“Don’t make a reservation.”

“You don’t mind, do you?”

I didn’t answer.

I couldn’t answer.

Instead, I ran my fingers through Rino’s hair once more.

Rino didn’t seem to take my silence as a rejection.

As if relieved, she relaxed her body.

“Seita.”

“What?”

“What if I told you not to go home today?”

“I’m going home.”

“That was a quick answer.”

“But I’ll stay until you fall asleep.”

Rino opened her eyes.

She stared at me, looking surprised.

“Really?”

“If you had to work late, you must be tired. I’ll keep you company for a little while.”

“Seita.”

“What?”

“I love you.”

“I know.”

In the past, I wouldn’t have known how to respond and would have stayed silent.

But now, the words came out naturally.

Rino laughed, almost as if she were about to cry, and rested her forehead against my chest.

“You know, and yet you’re still here with me.”

“……Yeah.”

“I’m counting on that.”

I didn’t answer right away.

I was afraid of raising her hopes.

I was afraid of both accepting someone’s affection and admitting my own.

But right now, Rino was in my arms.

I didn’t think about running away.

“You can count on it.”

I replied in a soft voice.

Rino looked up.

Our gazes met again at close range.

This time, Rino didn’t move closer.

She just looked at me, as if waiting.

I started to reach out toward her cheek.

But just before I touched her, I stopped my fingers.

I’m still scared.

Even so, I didn’t pull my hand back.

With my fingertips, I tucked Rino’s hair—which wasn’t even damp—behind her ear.

“That’s enough for today.”

When I said that, Rino smiled, looking a little disappointed.

“Yeah. Just for today.”

The distance between us had widened just a tiny bit from a moment ago.

Still, our shoulders touched, and Rino’s hand lay on top of mine.

Instead of lips that hadn’t touched, our fingers intertwined.

Twenty days left until the cultural festival.

Our relationship still didn’t have a name.

But the boundary between us had grown so thin that it felt like it would crumble at the slightest touch..

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Maigetsu

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