A Cheeky Junior Denied Me My Entire Life, so I Tested What Would Happen if I Jumped off a Rooftop to Vent My Anger
“Here you go, watchdog. It’s a Darjeeling First Flush. It’s my favourite from back home. I think you’ll like it.”
The grey-haired young man appears with a raven, smiles a friendly smile and places a teacup on the table. I sip from the cup, a little lost.
“…… sure, it smells good.”
The tea this man brewed was so delicious that such words naturally overflowed.
“I’m glad you liked it. …… I also prepared scones and clotted cream. They’re both homemade. They’re well made, you should try them.”
I was told and lifted the scone on the table to my mouth. The taste of the scone makes my eyes widen involuntarily.
“……! It’s delicious.
I thought I could cook a little bit, but this is on a different level. It’s nothing like those cafes. ……”
“Of course it is. You and I are not the same age. I’ve been making sweets for Master Reas for more than 200 years now. It’s only natural that they should taste good.”
The man laughs with the ease of a friend and sits down in front of me.
The man brought me to a Western-style house surrounded by deep forest, even further out of town than the abandoned building Asama-san took me to.
I am now in a room in that Western-style house. I don’t know what the room is for, but it is unnaturally spacious and luxurious. The young man with grey hair and I were sitting on an overdecorated chair in the middle of the room, drinking tea together.
“…… No, we’re not on good terms.”
I wanted to leave as soon as possible if I could because, to tell you the truth, this man didn’t look trustworthy. …… But I just don’t have the strength right now to shake off the flock of crows that are staring at me like they are watching me
If I move without thinking, as I did with the puppet master the other day, I might be killed this time. To take action, I need information. So I have no choice but to eat delicious tea and sweets while waiting to see what the man will do.
The man, whether conscious of my inner feelings or not, sips from his teacup with an elegant gesture.
“I’m Luca. Luca Cavalli. The avengers call me ‘Raven’, and I am the one they call ‘Raven’. How about you? Watchdog-kun.”
“…… Hi, I’m Susumu Aoi.”
I bow my head appropriately. The man laughs happily and continues speaking.
“Aoi kun, you are the one who is the best at this. I would like to ask you a question. Why do you work for Asama Ion?”
“No, I don’t serve her or anything like that. Me and Asama-san don’t have that kind of relationship.”
“…… I see. That’s …… unfortunate.”
For some reason, the man looks disappointed for a moment, but soon smiles comfortably again.
“But you’re on her side for a reason, aren’t you? Can you tell me that, please?”
“There’s no great reason. It’s just a …… thing that happens.”
“I see. Fate! Just like me. …… It’s wonderful!”
The man expresses his emotions with exaggerated gestures, like a performer in a play. …I tip my teacup again, thinking that maybe I’m not the type to be good at it.
“I’ve been thinking about you ever since I first saw you. You are just like me. I’d like to talk to you one day.”
“…But you seem to be quite cautious for someone like that.”
I point to the crows in the area.
“I’m not going to warn someone I despise. This is my respect for you.”
The crows fly by. Not only outside the house, but also inside the house, crows fly as a matter of course. Their movements are controlled and graceful. A crow’s feather would never get into a cup of tea.
The man pats the head of the crow perched on his shoulder and says.
“At first I planned to antagonise you too. But as I observed you on ……, I thought. I thought that if I talked to you, you would understand. That’s why I’ve been waiting for you with sweets.”
“That’s very kind of you, but isn’t it very late for tea? It’s after midnight.”
“…… I’m sorry about that. But I only have a limited amount of time to stay sane. If you were immortal, you’d understand, wouldn’t you? The loneliness of a sleepless night can be a mental killer.
If I don’t have a cup of tea like this, the darkness of the night will swallow me ……”
The man looks up to the heavens. I exhaled heavily.
“I’m sorry, but I don’t know what’s good for you. If you want people to understand you, you should first make an effort to understand them yourself. At this hour of the day, you can’t just force your way into a mansion on the outskirts of town and ask to speak to someone.”
“…… Haha. That may be true, But have you made an effort to understand?”
“Why would I talk about you, a man I don’t even know?—”
“It’s not about me, it’s about Asama Ion. Have you ever made an effort to understand that woman?”
“…………”
I didn’t answer anything. The man stands up and continues speaking happily.
“For you, Asama Ion is really an existence that is an abomination. You are aware of this by instinct. That’s why you didn’t try to force your way into her. It is inevitable that a winged insect attracted to a bonfire will burn if it gets too close to the fire.”
“…… That’s quite an argument.”
“But it’s true. You know nothing about her. She killed the king I adored,…… Master Rheas.”
“…… I know that. Something about an awesome immortal who lived for over a thousand years, and Asama-san killed …… him, right?”
Well, that’s not what I heard from Asama-san herself, but I’ll quit saying it now. The man grits his teeth and stares at the empty wall.
“…… Yes, that’s right. The ‘Emperor of Heaven’, Rheas of Grimkaram. The one who is worthy to rule the world. Power, intelligence and that overwhelming charisma!There is no one on this planet who can match him! It was my role to make him a cup of tea! For over 200 years, it was my only reason for living! That’s what she stole from me!”
“So you hold a grudge against Asama-san?”
“…… you know all too well the pain of losing your reason for living, don’t you?”
The man’s bloodshot eyes look at me. He cawed sadly, as if a crow was lamenting. …… Yes, I do. I have lost my painting, my reason for living.
It was my own fault and no one can blame me. But if someone had taken my painting away from me,…… I might have hated that person for the rest of my life.
“Even if that was the case, …… it doesn’t matter.”
He brushes his hair back to counteract the boring thoughts that pop into his head. The man sits down in his chair with another exaggerated gesture and sips his tea.
“Watchdog-kun. …… No, Susumu Aoi. You lost your parents some time ago, didn’t you?”
“…… You know so much, don’t you?”
“Of course I do.
My crows are watching everything in this city. …I’m often interrupted by that damn puppet master, but I think I know most of what happens in this town. Especially around Asama-Ion.”
“I see. …… I’ve certainly lost both my parents. And? What’s that all about?”
The man said in a voice that sounded like he was about to vomit in response to that question.
“──Rheas-sama is the biological father of Asama Ion”
“…….”
Unintentionally, I almost drop my teacup. The man laughed happily and continued his words.
“Susumu Aoi. You have always regretted the loss of your parents because of you. Isn’t that right? But that woman …… Asama Ion killed her own father with her own will.’
“Is that …… true?”
“If you think it’s a lie, you can ask her directly! That woman would never pretend to be something she is not! she…… is a creature that doesn’t need to lie!”
“…………”
I can’t say anything. The man’s voice just echoes over the cawing of the crows.
“And, of all people, that woman is …… not tired of her father alone, she wants to kill her surviving mother as well! You …… know what I’m talking about, don’t you? Susumu Aoi! You have every reason to despise her, you have no reason to trust her!”
Then I remembered Rio san’s words from the other day. Indeed, she said that Asama san came to this town to kill her mother. At that time, I didn’t really worry about it, just thought there must be something wrong with it…
“…… something’s going on, isn’t it? I certainly regret my parents.
But that doesn’t mean I’m going to meddle in other people’s affairs.”
“Both Master Rheas and Kanata loved that woman.
…… Normally, immortals cannot have children with each other. With each passing hour, the reproductive function of immortals declines. For those of us who live in infinity, there is no reason to procreate.”
A crow dances around. Their …… movements are not as graceful as they were earlier. The crows fly around, not caring if they get feathers in the tea.
“In the midst of all this, like a miracle, that woman was born. We congratulated her. For the first time in decades, Master Rheas laughed. Asama Ion was loved without a doubt. We gave her all the love we could. …… and yet, yet that woman! She killed Master Rheas!”
“…… listen. There was something going on, wasn’t there? I don’t think Asama-san would do something like that without a reason.”
“Reason? I asked her too! I asked her why …… she killed Master Rheas! She is the daughter of the one I adored more than anyone else. If there were any circumstances, I would have accepted them. …… But that woman said!”
The man taps the table. The teacups fall over and the tea overflows, but the man doesn’t seem to care and shouts.
“- just killed them because she didn’t like them…”
The crows increase in number. The man’s words do not stop.
“You saw it, didn’t you? The world she lives in! The otherworldly concept.
Her world beyond the gate is stained red with blood! To her, this world is nothing but a pool of blood! That woman is not normal! That thing has no right to live in this world ……!”
“So you’re going to kill her….?”
“That’s right! That woman is a witch who killed her parents! I have the right to kill her!”
A man kicks the table. Tea and scones fall to the floor. I can only stare at the man in front of me.
“Besides, that woman has been hiding the fact that she killed her father while you’ve been repenting for your parents! Her hands are …… stained with blood, her world is stained with blood! That woman killed Master and laughed! You and that woman, who regrets killing your parents, will never understand each other!”
“T-That’s ……”
…… thoughts, hazy. This man does not seem to be telling a lie. Asama-san killed her parents. I …… killed my father and mother, too. I have always regretted it, but Asama-san was always …… smiling.
—Can I ever forgive a girl like that?
I stopped Hijiyama-san and the others who tried to hurt Kamiya-san many times. I disliked Kamiya-san, but more than that, I thought what Hijiyama-san and the others did was wrong.
Asama-san killed her own father, and now she is trying to kill her mother. I like Asama-san. …… but no matter what my true feelings are, shouldn’t I hate her for that deed?
“Susumu Aoi. Won’t you kill Asama Ion with me? With your power, I’m sure I can kill her. If you can also kill the evil person who killed your parents, you may be able to make a clean break with your past. You might even be able to paint again. …… It was fate that you and that woman met.You are destined to kill her.”
The man reaches out his hand to me.I’ve always wanted to know Asama-san. …… In fact, I had plenty of opportunities to talk to her. The man said that the reason why I didn’t ask anything is because I was aware of it from somewhere.
─ ─ Me and Asama-san can’t understand each other.
If I knew, I would realise that, so I avoided her. I was afraid of finding out what was behind that beautiful smile.
“But…….”
Even so, Asama-san was kind to me. She saved me many times. Now …… she is the only one left for me. If I reject Asama-san, there will be nothing left for me. ……
“I see. You’ve been bewitched by a witch……. I have no choice. I’m very sorry, but if you insist on taking that woman’s side,…… I’ll have to kill you before you become a harmful enemy.”
“……!”
The crow’s amber eyes glow dully. …… I reflexively shake off the approaching crow.
“Why are you resisting? There’s no reason for you to support Asama Ion or to stop me…Well, in the first place, you don’t have a reason to live right now, right? You don’t really want to live, do you?”
“That’s …….”
I couldn’t think of a counter-argument to his quick words. Seeing me like that, the man laughs.
“Asama Ion is not a reason for you to live, okay? She doesn’t love you. If she did love you, she would kill you sooner or later. She is that kind of woman, that kind of monster.”
“That’s ……”
I don’t know Asama-san well enough to say that it’s not true.
“You jumped to your death once from a rooftop, didn’t you? You became an immortal, betrayed by the death you would have wanted. And now you’ve been spotted by the worst of them all. I don’t know what’s her thinking, but I’m sure …… she thinks you’re nothing more than a watchdog to distract those troublesome avengers.”
“Even if it is ……, I’m …….”
“Take it easy. You don’t have to dress up. …… you want to die. This world is not worth your life. Even if …… I kill you, Asama Ion will never cry, okay? Even you can’t imagine her crying, can you?”
The crows increase in number. There’s no way I can resist this number by myself. …Suddenly, I thought.
“……You may be right.”
I don’t have a reason to live anymore. Betrayed by my childhood friend, betrayed by my best friend, hated by my juniors, and the painting that was most important to me…I can’t draw anymore. I have no family. I have no friends or lovers. My allies aren’t going anywhere anymore.
─ ─ The only person I had now was Asama-san.
The world in which Asama san lived was beautiful. My heart was racing at the risk of my life. I wished I could live with her.
But I don’t even know anything about Asama-san. What is she hiding behind that smile? …… Whatever she was hiding, I was going to be by her side. But she is the kind of person who would kill her parents with her own will. Do I still want to be by her side like that, do you still think so ……?
“Haha…….”
Crows attack me. Much more sophisticated movements than the puppet master’s dog the other day. There are so many of them and there’s nowhere to run. In no time at all, I’m nothing but food for the crows. And yet, still, I feel no pain.
“……Oh, I see.”
Suddenly, I realised. Like a revelation, I understood. Maybe I was already …… dead.
‘HaHaha! That’s right.
That’s right! I shouldn’t be able to draw …….
I’ve been dead for a long time! A corpse couldn’t have painted! That’s not …… such a thing, even a child could understand that, but what am I ……”
Maybe the reason I don’t feel pain is because I was never alive in the first place. …… corpses don’t feel pain. It’s only natural. I jumped off that rooftop and thought I had failed to die, but in truth I may have just been dragging …… a corpse along.
Then there’s no reason to fight it now.
“…………”
Suddenly, I looked out the window. The night sky was visible. It is not …… raining. But somehow I can hear the sound of that day’s rain in my ears. I think I might have died with my father and mother on that rainy day. ……
“Then it would have been the same if I had died here too…….”
I meditate. I can no longer see or hear anything. All I could hear was the deafening sound of the rain that day..