I Went Back in Time to 10 Years Ago and Saved My Young Lady Childhood Friend and She Became My Fiancee ~She’s Honest and Cool and Looks at Me Like She Wants to Be Cared For~
Minamori is gone. Where did she go?
“”Sara-chan seemed to have gotten a call from the manager earlier, and she went that way.
I heard from a girl who had been talking with Minamori just before. A phone call from the manager. I wonder if idols sometimes receive job offers without worrying about the timing. Or maybe it’s …….
If it really was a work call, she would have left immediately.
However, I found Minamori sitting on a wooden bench, not on the phone, but staring tiredly at the sky.
“…… Minamori.”
“Wow.”
For some reason, she froze when she recognized me.
“What’s wrong?”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t think you’d come.”
“I’ll leave if you don’t want me to.”
“No, I’m fine.”
She slid her body to the side and opened a space on the bench for one person. I wonder if she was asking me to sit down.
“It reminds me of the first time we met.”
“Yes, it does.”
The timing of our first meeting. Minamori had thrown up, so I sat her down on a bench inside the school and we talked until she recovered.
We met because I happened to be looking out the window.
Unlike Minamori’s usual voice, her voice sounded muffled. I felt a little tiredness seeping through. Come to think of it, at the campfire, there were students from other classes and classmates who couldn’t be in the same group. It must have been a tough time for them.
“…… Enami-kun, is it okay for you to stay here?”
“Hm?”
“Everyone’s there,…… Hina-chan, …… Orihara-kun, Onizaki-kun, and so on.”
“I’ve talked to a lot of them. The only person I haven’t talked to much today is Minamori, who is in the camping group.”
“…I see.”
Minamori looked up at the sky and I looked up too. You can see the stars much better here than in the city. The moon, however, is covered with clouds, so you can’t see it well.
“I’d like to talk about how I became an idol.”
That’s the same as saying, “I want to talk about it and I want you to listen to me”
“Sure.”
There was still time before the end of the campfire.
There was no particular reason to refuse.
◆
Why I started being an idol was to change who I was.
Ever since I was a little girl, I had always been a reclusive person.
I was shy, and when my elementary school classmates tried to talk to me, I chose my words too carefully and didn’t respond well. When I tried to talk to people outside my family, my mind would go blank.
I didn’t really like myself like that.
But one day, I saw an idol on TV. She had a pretty smile on her face and was recognized by everyone. I realized that I had a strong yearning for that world.
[I wanted to be an idol….]
When I told my parents, they looked surprised, but in the end they nodded their heads. That was probably the first day I made my intentions clear. My father and mother respected that.
After passing the audition at the training school, I began my days of practice. I can’t say it myself, but I was pretty good at getting the …… hang of it. Practice itself is fun. I was able to do things that I couldn’t do before. Little by little, I was getting closer to the idols I saw on TV.
But even here, my traditional shyness got in the way.
Singing and dancing by myself was good, but my shyness didn’t improve.
My mind goes blank when people are watching me, and when that happens, I can’t sing or dance well.
[If it’s too difficult, why don’t you try …… being the girl you like?]
When I was struggling one day, my mother gave me such advice. It was a revelation.It wasn’t enough to be me – I had to be someone else.
Thus, “Minazuki Sara” as an idol was formed.
I am a genius. An idol who tells herself that. She does this in order to increase the pressure on herself and improve various qualities. While being stoic like that, I also show a side of myself that is out of the ordinary in my private life.
That is the kind of idol I have become. By putting on a character over myself, my usual shyness has improved considerably. My private speaking has become smoother, and my awkwardness when talking to someone has lessened.
–but on the inside, I’m still the same person I’ve always been.
I put on the character of an idol and talk as the other person expects me to talk.
But that is a different person from me. I feel uncomfortable with this discrepancy. But I can’t get out of this habit that has become ingrained in me. Talking to people is stressful in itself. But as an idol, I enjoy interacting with people.
Without any improvement in my personality, my character is still walking around on its own.
Since becoming popular as an idol, I have been getting involved with people in my private life. While I smiles as a popular idol, inside I am still carrying my own stomach.
Even though I want to be Minazuki Sara
◇
“I’ve been trying to do my best for a long time, but I just have a hard time going out in front of people.”
Minamori told me about her ideals as an idol and the reality of not being an idol.
This is something I can’t even begin to understand.
“What do you think, Enkami-kun? Maybe I’m not cut out to be an idol. I don’t think I could perform live like this.”
In the streetlight, Minamori’s face was clearly filled with anxiety. She showed a lack of confidence in herself. I’m sure she’d been carrying this around for a long time. I can only imagine, though.
“….I don’t think Minamori’s mentality is suited to be an idol.”
“……Then.”
“But I think her skills have enough parameters to compensate for that.”
That’s my objective opinion.
“I think it’s pretty reckless for a person to be an idol if she’s going to throw up when she starts high school. But in fact, she hasn’t been this out of shape. Your popularity is growing. You’ve even got a live show. This is the result of Minamori’s hard work.”
“Yeah……”
“Minamori is undeniably a genius in terms of technique. She can do well as an idol.”
“Yeah …., that’s probably true.”
Minamori knew she wasn’t suited to be an idol.
Minamori knew she wasn’t cut out to be an idol. That’s why she took on the character of Minazuki Sara, who wasn’t herself, and went on stage. It’s not something that a normal person can do. That’s why Minamori should become an idol, and she can perform live.
–But that is an objective point of view.
This is not enough. This will only end with Minazuki Sara being rewarded. There is someone who needs to be rewarded more. Minamori.
—And one more thing.
It’s not about Minazuki Sara, it’s about Minamori Sara.
“I …… want to affirm Minamori’s efforts.”
“…… Eh?”
“The reason why Minamori has suffered is because you were desperate to become an idol. Minazuki Sara is certainly an amazing idol, but it is Minamori who has to suffer in order to maintain that appearance. Minamori certainly has a weak mentality. As the Weak Stomach Alliance, I can guarantee that.”
“I know, I know.”
Minamori had said this to me when we first met.
I tend to get sick to my stomach, too, but Minamori probably suffers from it more often and with greater strength.
“But Minamori is the one who has suffered and worked hard in spite of her weak mentality. It is absolutely wrong to belittle it. That’s why …… my personal opinion is that Minamori is suited and unsuited to be an idol. But Minamori who works hard as an idol should be recognized.”
“…………”
The pain of performing as Minazuki Sara. The process of that effort should be affirmed.
“I don’t understand …… what’s going on, but…”
Minamori stood up and laughed like a fool. She looked as if she had lost some of her possessions.
In the sky, the clouds were clearing and the moon was beautiful.
“Thank you. I feel much better now.”
Minamori smiles, not as an idol, but with her real face. The smile of Minamori, both as an idol and now, is very attractive.
Maiban