The Issue With Her Arrow Pointing at Me Being Way Too Big
I was a very shy person.
It was something deeply ingrained in me, something I couldn’t easily changeโฆ I rarely spoke to anyone first, and the only person I could really talk to properly was my childhood friend, Makoto.
Even in high school, that didn’t change, but it never bothered me.
Left alone, not targeted by anyone, never botheredโฆ I thought it was fine just to quietly read manga, one of my hidden hobbiesโฆ That’s what I always believed.
Butโฆ
โHey, you okay?โ
Then, a change came to my unchanging days.
That change was meeting himโKannagi Amato. Meeting him, getting to know him, made me want to talk to someone for the first timeโฆ made me wish to share time with someone.
[Kannagi-kunโฆ you’re totally different from what I expected?]
[Wellโฆ yeah, kinda messed up my high school debut, huh?]
Like me, everyone else thought Amato-kun was a delinquent.
To me, he reminded me of Nakazato-kun from the past, so I avoided getting involved. But precisely because of that, the more I got to know Amato-kun, the more I found myself watching him.
[Hey, cut it out, you bastard.]
Our first encounter happened when I unexpectedly got hit on outside.
Not knowing what to do, I froze up, remembering Nakazato-kun. That’s when Amato-kun saved me.
I couldn’t believe it was that Amato-kunโฆ yet, shielding me with his back, he was gentle. He might be a bit of a pushover, but he possessed an overwhelmingly larger physique than mine, radiating raw biological strength. Being protected by himโฆ I found it strangely comforting.
[Umโฆ thanks, Kannagi-kun.]
[No big deal. More importantly, you weren’t actually hit on, were you?]
Amato-kun, worrying about meโฆ Not only is this moment deeply etched in my memory, but just this single act completely shattered the preconceptions I’d held about him.
[Actuallyโฆ I wanted to be a cool guy, so I dyed my hair and started hitting the gym, working out hard. Mom thinks it looks awesome, but at school, everyone just thinks I look like a delinquent.]
He told me this, shoulders hunched, eyes downcast.
Honestlyโฆ honestly, I felt bad for him, but hearing that story made me laugh so hardโฆ and seeing him pout with his cheeks puffed out because he wasn’t amused was adorable tooโฆ Watching him like that, I felt like I was seeing one of those โactually kind-hearted delinquentsโ you see in manga.
[A gentle delinquent? I don’t think of you as a delinquent at all, not even a little bit.]
[If people are going to see you as either strong or weak, it’s better to be seen as strong. My dad always told me to overwhelm people with my first impressionโฆ But the real me is a total coward, you know?]
To me, he really was a bundle of contradictions.
Could someone with this look really be timidโฆ? I wondered, but when we talked, Amato kun was genuinely quiet and gentleโฆ I realized that was the truth. And above all, seeing him study so earnestly was adorable.
[Studyingโฆ studyingโฆ]
[I hate studyingโฆ I hate it!!]
[I get itโฆ I get it! I’ll be good and learn!]
Honestlyโฆ spending time with him is truly enjoyable.
Frankly, I’d always wondered why I wanted to be involved with him so muchโฆ why I wanted to get close to him. But I think it’s probablyโฆ because he hits every single one of my buttons.
โAhโฆ Amato-kun.โ
I read a lot of mangaโฆ sometimes even slightly risquรฉ ones.
I especially like stories where a quiet heroine gets transformed by a delinquentโฆ or things like that. I enjoy them precisely because they’re in mangaโin real life is another matter.
โBut you’re different, Amato-kunโฆ You’re different from everyone else.โ
Just being at the mercy of a delinquent is only in my fantasiesโฆ In reality, I still want to be treated gently as a girl.
For someone like me with those desires, Amato-kun was absolutely perfect.
He’d never imagineโฆ that I comfort myself thinking of him nearly every nightโฆ that I constantly think only of him at school.
โAnd today tooโฆโ
Nakazato-kunโฆ the one who bullied Makoto.
Nothing I said today was a lie. It’s true I dated him for two weeks, and nothing irreversible happenedโฆ Well, I was just a middle schooler back then, but looking back now, I resent myself for making such a shallow choice.
โAnd in the endโฆ Makoto is blissfully unaware, just going about his life.โ
Makoto is my childhood friendโฆ that’s all.
We were really close until middle school, but now we only talk if he speaks to meโฆ though our parents are still good friends.
โHe had such a big backโฆโ
Amato-kun’s back was broad, and the hand resting on my shoulder was big too.
The way he protected me was cool, and knowing his true self, I sometimes wonder if he’s putting on a bit of an actโฆ But to me, everything I saw of him today was cool.
โAmato-kunโฆ Oh myโกโ
Ah, againโฆ Tonight too, I’ll think of him before sleep and comfort myself.
I just can’t hold back anymoreโฆ Thinking about Amato-kun makes my body burn up and feel crazy.
โI want you to do everything you wantโฆ I’m all yours.โ
What I imagine is all of him.
The smile he wears beside me. The troubled look when he struggles with his studies. The muscles I saw when he rolled up his gym uniform during PEโฆ I want him to ravage me.
โAhโฆโกโ
But at the same time, I want him to be gentle tooโฆ
My hair, which I take good care of, my still-growing large breasts, my beautiful private parts that haven’t allowed anything yetโI want Amato-kun to do whatever he wants with all of it.
โโฆHeheโชโ
Ahโฆ I wish tomorrow would come quickly so I could see him again.
ใโผโฝ
I’m actually pretty well-behaved at school.
I’m never late, I don’t skip class, I don’t get into fights, I don’t talk back to teachersโฆ Huh? Wait, I’m actually super serious, aren’t I?
โYo, Amato! Wanna hit the bathroom?โ
โHuh? Oh, yeahโฆ I guess I’ll go.โ
He tapped my shoulder, and I thought it was perfect timing, so I stood up.
The one inviting me to the bathroom was Mizushima Sasuke, one of my few friends.
He looks like a delinquent, just like me, but he’s not a bad guy.
Well, he’s the type who gets judged by his looks too, but he doesn’t seem to care at all.
[I’m Mizushima Sasuke, call me Sasuke! Even though it’s a name like this, I’m not some samurai descendant or anything, so nice to meet ya!]
That was his first lineโฆ pretty colorful character, this guy.
โOh, right. This Saturday, I’m planning to hang out with some girls from another high school. Wanna come, Amato?โ
โโฆAh, I’m good.โ
โThere’ll be cute girls! Girls with big boobs, even!โ
โNah, I’m fineโฆโ
โฆI was kinda tempted.
Sasuke often invites me like this, and I’ve gone along a few times when it sounded fun. It’s not like it’s anything shady; it’s just hanging out with students from other schools.
It’s all within the bounds of perfectly wholesome high school stuff. In fact, quite a few guys have ended up with girlfriends thanks to Sasuke.
โWell, if you ever wanna come, just say the word.โ
โAlright.โ
โI wanna stay on good terms with Amato.โ
โWhy now, though?โ
โBecause I think you’re a genuinely good guy, duh?โ
โฆSeriously, this guy gets so screwed over by his looks.
After that, I used the restroom and parted ways with Sasuke. On the way out, I spotted Ayaka walking with her head down.
She’s gonna crash into something like thatโฆ?
Thinking that, I approached from behind and tapped her shoulder.
โYaaah!?โ
โWhoa, sorryโฆ Didn’t expect you to jump like that.โ
โAhโฆ Amato-kun.โ
Her startled expression instantly softened into a relieved smile when she realized it was me.
Seeing her expression change so quickly like that, I could tell she really did accept me.
We don’t often talk in places where people can see us, but this much is probably fine.
โYou’ll bump into something if you keep walking with your head down.โ
โY-Yeah, you’re rightโฆ Thanks, Amato-kun.โ
โNo problem. I’m just a worrywart.โ
โYouโฆ you were worried about me?โ
โOf course I was.โ
โโฆEheheโชโ
That’s how close we’ve gottenโฆ huh.
Just as I was about to wrap up the conversation earlyโMakoto appeared from the side and grabbed Ayaka’s hand.
โAyaka, we should get back to class soon.โ
โHuh? Ah, wait a secโโ
โฆCould he be misunderstanding something?
Though that thought crossed my mind, I was actually a little impressed that Makoto could pull off something like that.
But at the same time, seeing Makoto holding Ayaka’s handโฆ made me feel just a tiny bit annoyed.
Maiasa