The Love of My Childhood Friend, Who Has Overcome a Terminally Ill Diagnosis, Is Overwhelming
After buying our amulets and finishing our prayers, we started walking away from the shrine.
“We’ve got to make sure we don’t get separated this time.”
“Yeah. …Ei”
Kanade, looking somewhat amused, grabbed my right hand.
“Hehe. This way, we won’t get separated, right?”
“…Kanade.”
Feeling the warmth of Kanade’s left hand, I thought to myself.
“Are you a genius or something?”
“Hehe. I bet I am, don’t you think?”
With that little charade over, we made our way toward the shopping district.
As usual, the street lined with shops was teeming with tourists.
…But this time, since I was holding Kanade’s hand, we didn’t get separated.
“There aren’t as many people over here.”
Leading her, I pointed away from the shops toward the path leading to the arcade.
There were people in the arcade too, of course… but compared to this shopping street, it looked like we could walk easily without holding hands.
We made it safely to the arcade.
“Phew. Now we don’t have to hold hands anymore.”
“…Don’t have to hold hands?”
I let go of Kanade’s hand and smiled at her, but… there was no sparkle in her eyes.
“So. Where should we go next?”
I didn’t pay much attention to Kanade’s demeanor. Over the past week, I’d grown accustomed to seeing her with that same vacant look in her eyes.
“Kanade?”
“…You idiot, A-kun.”
…An idiot, is that so?
“True, I am an idiot.”
It’s been a few years since I parted ways with Kanade and set my sights on becoming a doctor.
Even though I’m still just a kid, I’m in a situation where I need to start showing some results, yet I haven’t accomplished a thing.
If that isn’t being an idiot, then what is?
“…Muu.”
Kanade made a sour face and started walking ahead of me.
It seems I’ve managed to upset her.
Damn it.
This is all because I haven’t tried hard enough…!
“Wait for me, Kanade.”
I ran after her.
But even though I was running fast… her pace was quick, and I just couldn’t catch up.
Come to think of it, she had amazing athletic ability before she got sick.
Even though she probably couldn’t do any proper exercise while she was sick… it seems her athletic ability hasn’t rusted at all.
“W-wait for me—”
This wasn’t the time to be saying things like that.
I started running.
At this rate, I really was going to lose sight of Kanade.
…Or rather, does she even know her way around this area?
“Ka-Kanade…”
Panting heavily as I chased after her, I ended up at a river.
“Ah, A-kun.”
Right in the middle of the bridge, between the river and the highway—a spot where you could see the whole surrounding city—Kanade was standing.
“The view from here is great, isn’t it?”
…Even though I’d worked up a sweat, she had the nerve to say something so carefree.
“Are you in a better mood now?”
I asked.
“Don’t be silly. I wasn’t in a bad mood to begin with.”
…That’s a bit of a stretch.
But faced with Kanade’s beaming, almost intimidating smile, all I could do was give a wry smile in return.
“…I didn’t see that coming.”
Leaning against the bridge railing, Kanade continued.
“To think I’d get to hang out with you in a place with such a great view.”
…I couldn’t bring myself to reply.
It felt like my chest was being squeezed.
Because that meant Kanade had previously given up on ever seeing me again.
…I thought it meant she had given up on living.
From the day we reunited until now, Kanade has been smiling all the time.
She seems to be enjoying the present moment.
Perhaps because our lives were once connected, every single second feels precious to her.
It was just a vague impression, but that’s how it struck me.
So… I never expected her to suddenly bring up the subject of life and death.
No, but come to think of it… Kanade does sometimes say, “Because I almost died once.”
And that’s not all.
[Hahaha. Did you think I was dead?]
On the first day we met again, Kanade asked me that question.
I’m sorry to say, but I had to agree with her.
Actually… I’d thought we’d never see each other again.
Kanade at that moment…
[I knew it.]
She said that with a mischievous smile.
She must have thought she was beyond saving, even to herself.
No, since she’s actually alive… it might be more accurate to say she thought that, at least for a while.
“…Kanade.”
A belated question popped into my head.
“How did you survive?”
When I actually said it out loud… it was a pretty harsh question.
It almost sounded like I wanted her to die.
It wouldn’t be hard to hear it that way.
Kanade’s eyes widened at my question.
…Is she going to get mad at me?
A few seconds later, Kanade smiled at me, who was cowering in fear.
…Seeing that smile, I knew exactly what she was going to say.
“It’s fate.”
…Just as I thought.
“……Kanade. Please don’t joke around—just tell me.”
“I’m not joking.”
Kanade laughed.
“But, well… the reason I’m alive?”
“…Yeah.”
“Well, it’s simple.”
Is it simple?
“Akkun, you said it once, didn’t you? That love doesn’t save people. But that love is essential for living.”
Come to think of it, I do remember saying something like that once.
“Basically… I’m alive because I was meant to be.”
“……”
“…There were parts of me that had given up, but at the last minute, I decided I wanted to live a little longer.”
Kanade gave a wry smile.
“Because I wanted to live at the last minute, I endured the painful treatment just to stay alive.”
I don’t know what her days at the treatment facility were like.
“To stay alive, I didn’t pick and choose—I ate meals with a balanced diet.”
But just listening to her talk…
“And, luckily, I met the brilliant doctor I needed to survive.”
Just seeing her talk about the past, I could somehow understand.
“…That’s why I’m alive.”
That the events Kanade had experienced were, most likely… extraordinarily harsh.
“You’re right. Looking back now, I don’t think those events happened because I was saved by love.”
…But Kanade endured it all.
“The fact that my mom and dad spent money on whatever they could—medical bills and all sorts of things—just so I could live… that’s another reason I’m still here.”
…The majority of her life owes its existence to the sacrifices her parents made.
“But… that isn’t the main reason I was able to survive.”
…It seems her parents’ sacrifices weren’t the most important thing to Kanade after all.
“…The reason I was able to survive is exactly what I told you before.”
Under the bridge, on the river… a water bus sped by.
“Because I couldn’t forget the worried look on A-kun’s face as he left that day.”
Before I knew it, I was mesmerized by Kanade’s smile.
“Because I wanted to put your mind at ease, I… endured painful treatments, ate foods I hated… and even managed to attract the good fortune of meeting a brilliant doctor. I made up my mind to survive until I met that brilliant doctor.”
…That was her motivation for living.
“…You’re amazing.”
“Not as amazing as you, though.”
Kanade’s life was woven from her parents’ deep love, a huge sum of money… and her feelings for me.
“…So, why don’t you give up on studying abroad and enjoy college life with me instead?”
My heart wavered just a little.
Maiasa