I’ve Been Working My Hardest as Manager of the Girls’ Track and Field Team, but Ever Since I Retired, the Team Members Have Been Coming at Me Like Crazy!?
Out of the corner of my eye, I watched Sen-chan fidgeting nervously, conscious of Moe-chan’s gaze and the distance between him and Mai-chan, while I lost myself in memories of Sen-chan.
Sen-chan.
I love everything about you.
I love you so much.
The way you always look so laid-back, the fact that you’re surprisingly tall, and your slightly deep voice.
I didn’t think anything of it the first day he joined the club.
Sen-chan, though—he messages me on LINE every single day, saying he wants to talk things over with me.
He confides in me about all his worries, even the ones he can’t tell Moe-chan or Mai-chan.
It made me happy that he thought I was easier to talk to than those two.
I failed the public high school entrance exam, so I ended up attending a school a little way from my hometown, and I’ve been living on my own since high school.
So there’s never anyone in my room.
I felt lonely every day, and I used to spend all my nights calling my parents.
But Sen-chan kept reaching out to me, day after day.
I used to hate those lonely nights.
But at some point, I started looking forward to nightfall.
Wondering when Sen-chan would contact me.
Every time my phone rang, my heart would race as I stared at the screen.
There were times when tears would just well up if Sen-chan didn’t reach out.
But then, when he finally did contact me, my eyes would turn bright red from tears of joy.
It’s the first time I’ve ever depended on something—or someone—this much.
Maybe I was just lonely, but even so, I’m dependent on Sen-chan.
I can’t even imagine a day without Sen-chan.
I can’t stand the time when I can’t talk to Sen-chan.
You know how I sometimes just wander off on my own?
Well, it’s not like I’m doing it on purpose, you know?
Sometimes, I just can’t hold back.
I get this urge to lock Sen-chan away in a tiny, tiny space.
An unused locker room I found at a tournament venue.
A dark corner of the hotel where we stayed on a road trip.
Or even a school storage room.
I’d lock Sen-chan in there, and I’d lock myself in there too.
Then we could just be together forever, I thought.
Actually, there was a good spot at today’s venue, too.
A place that used to be used as a players’ waiting room.
Now it’s just a dark, cramped space where they store old equipment.
If Sen-chan and I were all alone in a place like that, I’d be so happy.
Of course, I know that locking someone up is wrong, and I have enough sense not to do something like that, so every time that impulse wells up, I try to distance myself from Sen-chan and just wander around alone.
Because whenever I look at Sen-chan, that rational side of me feels like it’s about to fly out the window.
When I see him talking to Moe-chan or arguing with Mai-chan, it just makes me feel all restless.
I wonder if those urges would go away if Sen-chan’s heart belonged only to me.
…Sen-chan’s profile is so handsome.
Ah, being in this cramped taxi with Sen-chan—I’m so happy.
If only Moe-chan and Mai-chan weren’t here.
I might as well just stay here like this.
“I want to lock him up.”
jesus christ